We’ve ranked every food stall in Cambridge Market

Let me set the scene for you: you’ve just left the library, the midday Easter sun is setting, you’re tired of your degree and frustrated that academics refuse to write like normal people. The worst part? The day is only half over.

But fear not, dear reader, The Tab has you covered! Whether sweet or savory, Spanish or Thai, hot or cold, we can meet all your culinary needs. Here are all the food stalls in Cambridge Market Square, ranked by quality, so your lunchtime decisions can be informed.

To ensure that my editors cannot blame me when we are inevitably sued for my groundbreaking, white-hot journalism, all opinions expressed in this article are my own. opinion and not the objective truth (I was recently informed that there was a difference between the two).

Dim Sum – 9/10

The dim sum stall, where wonders await

Market Square’s apex predator and my favorite spot. Menu variety, portion sizes, complementary sauces: they have it all and I find it hard to ask for more. The chefs are hidden in the building, so it’s a bit like a “black box”: the Chinese grandma comes in, the delicious food comes out. Although I would love to learn their secrets, I respect that some of the best art requires solitude.

The Mac Dad – 5/10

We failed to capture an image of it so… please forgive us

One of my more controversial takes, but I think the Macaroni & Cheese staple has to be very good for me to choose it among other choices. Points for having a vegan option though, and their BBQ/crispy onion dish is definitely their highlight.

Jian Bing House – 6/10

The Jian Bing House, with BAGELS making an appearance in the background

Undeniably, a certain appeal of this place is the novelty of having a spicy savory crepe, and they certainly don’t disappoint. That being said, I wasn’t a fan of their dry peanut noodles, but my friend was more than happy to have them, so what do I know?

Just Greek gyros – 5/10

They are fair. They are Greek. They are Gyros.

Can’t lie, the wrap wasn’t particularly memorable. That said, I went with my grandma and the guy behind the booth was extremely nice to her, so they get a first in senior customer service.

Neids – 2/10

Maybe if they had changed their slogan to “Portuguese and Brazilian cuisine” our reviewer would have been happier – Ed.

Having lived in Portugal as a child, I was thrilled to find there was a Portuguese food stall in the market. Now imagine my consuming desperation when I found out that they mainly sell Brazilian food (yes, there is a difference, don’t @ me) and Mexican food. I was crushed.

Azuma- 6/10

Azuma always stylish, with a trendy theme that gives pride of place to red

The food here is ok, nothing exceptional, but it’s How? ‘Or’ What the food is made it’s impressive. One of the chefs is a licensed hairdresser (you can get his business card at the front of the booth if you like his style), and the energy of his cooking matches his quirky hairstyle. I wouldn’t bother waiting in line for him to finish cooking, but he gets major points for styling.

Cardoso’s Kitchen – 4/10

This stand is a bit heartbreaking in that the food is actually quite good, only problem is I never really crave a curry with rice for lunch. It’ll knock me out of a food coma and make me fall asleep again in the UL. There’s also no option to make it spicier, which is a real shame for us spice lovers.

The noodle bar – 7/10

The reviewer mentions queues but none are visible in this photo…. curious – ed.

An interesting fact about this place is that it seems to have its own cult, and it’s not hard to see why. People swear by it as their only source of food at lunchtime, waiting in long lines just for their fried noodles. While I can understand why they love it so much, and I go there a lot myself, the long lines are a bit of a killer.

King of Wraps – 5/10

Wraps

Another passable wrap place. The components of their wraps are pretty good – I would recommend the chicken – but they don’t mix together very well in the wrap itself. The packaging is also not very tight, so it will unravel quickly if you don’t grip it firmly. That being said, I was pleasantly surprised that they offered Peri-Peri sauce for my wrap. Let me say again. Wrap.

Black rice – 4/10

Paella served with a thumbs up!

Not much to say about this place. If you want paella, great! Otherwise, go elsewhere. Paella is great don’t get me wrong but when you only sell two items your food has to be really good for justifying your lack of menu diversity. The lack of a vegetarian option also makes them lose points.

Hallouman – 6/10

They always asked ‘Where is Hallouman?’ but they never ask ‘How is Hallouman?’

A vegetarian’s paradise. I’m usually pretty skeptical of fancy one-man-ride stands, but the variety with which they use halloumi is commendable. That being said, I don’t go here often, not because it’s bad, but I just think too much cheese for lunch isn’t the best nutrition, although if you go to the market thinking about the nutrition, you already do. it’s wrong.

At Shelly and Sarah’s – 1/10

They have… seats? To be honest, I object to this stand ideologically – the food they offer simply cannot compete with the variety and quality of its adjacent competitors, and it feels out of place in the market. market spirit. They get a point for accessibility, but nothing more.

Wok Hei – 8/10

Fast, varied, high quality, you can even get boba here. This place is a paragon of skill in this battlefield of slow, fancy stalls, and I’m all here for it. They’ll even give you a fried egg as a topping, runny yolk and all, which makes me happy.

The Smoking Cow – 5/10

They weren’t lying when they said their burgers were indulgent: jalapenos, crispy onions, pickles and complementary sauces. The assembly was a little off, but we’ll let it slide. However, like many stalls here, they are limited by their lack of variety – no chicken burgers available, which earns them points since so many people religiously swear off beef.

African cuisine – 8/10

My first time trying fried plantain, jollof rice and goat cheese all in the same box combined into a formative experience for me. I’m ashamed to say this was my first foray into Nigerian cuisine, but even though I’m late to the party, I’m definitely a convert. I’ll be back here soon, hungry for more (no, I didn’t steal that from Ratatouille).

Cedric – 5/10

Okay, I have to admit that I haven’t in my whole life been able to tell the difference between these enveloping places. They make wraps. They put meat, lettuce and some sauces in it. They wrap them in some form of flat carbs. This place is no different, in fact I wish they were somehow worse because at least they would be outstanding, but here it is so aggressively average.

Venezuelan street food – 4/10

I love the funky vibe at this ngl booth

I appreciate how they bring food from Venezuela to Cambridge, contributing to the international variety of the market which I find to be its greatest strength, but the flavor disappoints slightly – the black beans and rice are rather unexciting. They are only around on weekends so if you are in the area I would recommend trying their Arepas, but don’t expect this stand to become your new favorite.

German sausage – 2/10

Even if you are a vegetarian, you can still find another type of German sausage online.

The usual process for a gimmick booth like this: go upstairs, get an ostrich burger because it’s new and exotic and you’ve probably never tried one before, taste it and realize it’s not is nothing special. Go there once, if at all, but if burgers are your go-to lunch food, you won’t be hard pressed to find a better alternative elsewhere.

Kouis Cypriot Cuisine – 6/10

I may have lied in my Cedric’s review in that all wraparound locations have negligible differences. Here, in the Market Square wrapidemic, the winner, the winner, the top wrap place. Not much I might add, but I found myself adhering to the traditional Cypriot method of wraps – yoghurt and lemon juice take the wrap as a dish from heavy, heavy and greasy to light, refreshing and effective as an input midday calorie that doesn’t put you in a food coma.

And that concludes our ranking. Now go enjoy market food!

Featured image credits: Joshuamiranda via Pixabay. All other image credits to AFC (anonymous food reviewer).

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